Morning surprise.

I've seen it many times before. Not always in the morning, at night mostly. Sometimes I seek it out, sometimes it seeks me out. Other times I don't care for it. Maybe because I'm tired, my stomach hurts or I just don't want to look at it. I've seen it many times before. Sometimes I think it's cute and it turns me on. Other times I'm slightly repulsed by it. It's not that cute, really. Sort of ugly and oddly shaped. Wrinkled and pink. In my eyes, it's just not attractive, however, I do enjoy it. This morning shouldn't had been unlike any other morning. You see, I know I've seen it so many times before. But when I walked in the bedroom this morning, griping my coffee, a mild shade of toffee, skim milk only please. I gasped, as I saw it in my boyfriends hands. He has strong hands, young hands, uncallused. His hands were being used in a different way this morning. Fingers interlocked, grasping his dick. Moving up and down, mouth wide open, forming a perfect "O." I looked from him to the computer. Boobs, blonde hair, a faint whisper of a sigh.

This is not what I expected this morning. As you see, I've seen it many times before, but this was new. A new way of seeing, it all.

Starting today.

I've been meaning to start this project for sometime, maybe half my life. I keep thinking that this should be the time to start this chronicle of my life. I'm nearing 29 years old and now is the time, as I feel up to now I haven't accomplished very much, which is funny because everyone around me tells me how much I've accomplished. Yes, that's the funny part. The truth is I'm a talker, a dreamer and an overachiever, but I find myself in an odd moment in my life where I don't know what I'm doing, where I'm going and which path is right for me. I'm 28, nearing 29 in the next month and I've found myself unemployed. I got laid off from a job I hated. Great, right? NO, because it's not great. I look around at all the people buzzing around me, bumping my shoulders at commute time, stepping on my toes and I secretly curse them for having some place to go, as I have no where to go. So you must be wondering what my story is and how I got to where I am, huh? It's honestly a long story and I wish I had the energy to tell the whole story, but not today, not now. I will though, I promise you I will. It will come out through this blog eventually. For now, I'll just chronicle my life and thoughts.